LIVING WITH UNCERTAINTY
The thing we can be certain about in life is that life is uncertain and us humans are constantly trying to avoid uncertainty.
I recently listened to a really interesting talk with my teacher Ashley Turner and Sheryl Paul about anxiety and how the uncertainty in transition periods of our life creates anxiety.
This is so TRUE!
Reflect for a moment on different transition periods in your life, perhaps when you moved city, you got asked to leave the flat your renting, you quit your job, you started a new and completely different job, you become a mum, you lived through a pandemic……. we find ourselves in numerous situations daily.
We each have a different capacity to deal with uncertainty and different things will trigger us, but when we’re feeling our most anxious or stressed it’s often because we’re moving through an uncertain time.
The top most uncertain moments in my life that really standout.
Figuring out what to do after university - my post turbulent time in my life. Thinking we need to have it all figured out and feeling the pressure from society.
Quitting my job to become a yoga teacher - this was a scary step in London. Not having a steady income and not know if it will work out.
Being pregnant - so much uncertainty, unknown, and subconscious fear that you inherit from society.
Moving to the countryside - uprooting my career, having to find new clients, having to find a steady income, having to make new friends and new roots, starting a whole new chapter of our lives. Exciting but it was very uncertain.
I’m someone who loves change and the opportunity in change but I get triggered by uncertainty, particularly financial and career uncertainty. I know this now as I’ve seen the pattern play out over and over. But I now know how to deal with it better and acknowledge the beauty and potential growth in the uncertainty.
The question is….
how can we ride the uncertainty from a more grounded place? And shift our perspective to see the uncertain moment as an opportunity for growth and change?
So here’s how I manage uncertainty:-
STEP 1 : Call it out
When you’re next feeling stressed or anxious notice if it’s because of uncertainty. If it is, call it out, own that fact and give yourself permission to feel what you’re feeling.
STEP 2 : Take Action
Write down a list of all the things you can’t control and put it to one side and then write down a list of all the things you can control. Following this, write down action points alongside all the things you can control.
What are you going to do? Who can help you? What questions do you need to ask yourself to think differently? What would someone else do? Can we see it from a different perspective? What are all my options?
STEP 3 : TRUST
Trust that everything will be ok. Trust that the universe has your back. Trust that if you take action and seek help you will get through this.
I love affirmations and when I was pregnant I would repeat over and over ‘I trust, I trust, I trust’ each time my mind played tricks on me. I do the same thing now when my mind is pulling me off into self-doubt or negative narrative. Find an affirmation that resonates for you and come to it each time your mind tries to make you feel more anxious because of the uncertainty.
We all go through uncertainty the entire time, calling it out, taking action and moving into a place of trust will help us feel more grounded and resilient to deal with the flux of uncertainty.
You might like to journal the below to bring any hidden fears or uncertainties from your subconscious into your awareness.
What is uncertain in my life right now?
What triggers me when I’m feeling stressed or anxious?
What is certain in my life that I want to change and perhaps could benefit from more uncertainty?
What uncertainty is out of my control? e.g. the pandemic
What do I truly desire in my life? And what action points do I need to take?